Modified Garter Stripe Baby Sock

Modified Garter Stripe Baby Sock

So I modified a baby sock pattern to be slightly larger and use a slightly different heel technique. There were maths involved. You’re welcome.

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(I forgot to take nice pictures so I snapped some as people were passing the baby shower gifts around!)

Size: 3-6 months (it’s been a while since I’ve had babies so I’m not sure how big they are)

Yarn: Knit Picks Comfy Fingering (Pictured: Ivory). Cotton blend yarn

Needles: US 0 (2.00 mm) circular or DPNs

Gauge: 9.6 sts = 1″

Directions:

CO 44 and join to work in the round. PM (I let my tail from my cast on remind me where the beginning of my round was)

Rnd 1: k1, p1 around

Repeat rnd until cuff measures 1/2 inch

(knit the leg)

Rnd 1: k7, p8, k16, p4, k9

Rnd 2: k44

Repeat rnds 1 & 2 until leg measures 2-1/2 inches from top of cuff

(short row heel)

Setup rnd: k7, p8, k7 (these sts become the instep). Now set up heel by working remaining 22 stst on new needle beginning with Row 1)

Row 1: k9, p4, k8, with 1st unworked on left needle

Row 2: YO backwards, p20, turn (1 st unworked)

Row 3: YO as usual, knit to purled garter stitch and p4 as normal, knit to paired sts made by YO of previous row (the YO will form a loop out of the side of the adjacent st), leaving 3 sts on left needle (i.e. do not work the pair), turn.

Row 4: YO backwards, purl to paired sts made by the YO of the previous row, turn.

(Make sure you keep purling the garter stripe on the knit rows to continue the pattern – until you start the decrease rows on the short row heel to make the heel cup.)

Rep the last 2 rows until there are 11 total sts between YOs (9 unpaired sts between YOs), ending with a WS row. Turn so RS is facing. Form the heel cup as follows:

Row 1: (RS) YO as usual, knit to the paired st made by YO of previous row, k1, (the first st of the pair), correct the mount of the YO (so that the leading edge is on the front of the needle), k2tog (the YO with the first st of the next pair, leaving a YO as the first st on the left needle), turn.

Row 2: (WS) YO backwards, purl to the paired st made by YO of previous row, purl the first st of the pair, sap (the YO with the first st of the next pair, leaving a YO as the first st on the left needle; turn.

Row 3: YO, knit to the paired st made by the YO of previous row, knit the first st of the pair (the next 2 loops will be YOs), correct the mount of each of these YOs, k3tog (2 YOs with the first st of the next pair), turn.

Row 4: YO backwards, purl to next YO (the next 2 loops are YOs), sssp ( 2 YOs with the first st of the next pair), turn.

Row 5: YO, knit to next YO (the next 2 loops will be YOs), correct the mount of each of these YOs, k3tog (2 YOs with the first st of the next pair), turn.

Repeat the last 2 rows until all YOs of heel have been consumed, ending with row 4. The last turn will bring RS facing – 22 std + 1 YO. Joining round: YO, knit to YO at end of needle, place this YO on next needle (first instep needle), k2tog ( the YO plus first st of next needle), work to last instep st, place YO at beg of next (heel) needle onto instep needle and work these 2 sts as ssk (last st of end plus YO)–44 sts. Rnd begins at beg of sole sts.

(Foot)

Rnd 1: k29, p8,k7

Rnd 2: k44

Repeat ends 1 & 2 until foot measures 2-1/2 inches from back of heel.

Short Row Toe:

Rearrange sts if necessary so that 22 bottom-of-foot (sole) sts are on one dpn. Work toe with short-rows as for heel, omitting very last YOs (the ones used to join heel to leg with k2tog and ssk) so that you end up with 22 sts at the conclusion of your short-rows.

Then use kitchener stitch to join the seam. I find Knitty’s tutorial to be the best.

This is a great little sock and I hodge podged several techniques and patterns to come to this one. It’s my favorite baby sock!

How to choose a daycare

How to choose a daycare

If you’re like me, then you have needed someone to care for your kids while you work. I’ve done more research than you could shake a stick at to find the right one… or one that just had openings.

Here are some off-beat things I check for when selecting a daycare.

1. Does my child like the facility? This is important. It’s going to be different. It’s going to be strange, but I’ve always made a point of taking my kids with me when selecting a daycare. If they’re old enough you can even ask them, “What do you think?” Sometimes a daycare will even let you drop your child off for half a day to see how they react. BabyGirl did this when I selected a place back in November. She loved it and couldn’t wait to start. Unfortunately several months later the daycare turned out not to be the best fit for us, but that leads us to the rest of my criteria:

2. Do the kids all have crusty snotty noses? This can be observed when you visit but can also be seen after you’ve selected the daycare. If the kids are left to let their snot dry it makes me wonder what else is let go. Constant diaper rash is also a concern. If your child is not being wiped well enough or being changed often enough they can get diaper rash a lot. These should be well within your scope of expectations for your child. There’s also the hygiene issue. If kids have snot on their faces, then they have germs just sitting there waiting to be smeared on a toy or other child. Yuck.

3. Are the babies in the infant room always crying? Babies cry. I get that. But your mama instincts will tell you if something is up. I’ve visited many daycares and there are some where the babies are constantly crying. Someone is not getting the attention they need, they’re uncomfortable or they’re not having their needs met in some way. Our current daycare? No crying. I’m sure they cry when they need something, but there isn’t crying the whole time I’m there. This is very good. I’ve been to several daycares where they are screeching the whole time and it breaks my heart. Babies know.

4. How does the facility feel to you? This is the most important gauge. When you walk in, do you feel comfortable or does it make your skin crawl. You don’t have to justify walking away if it makes you feel uncomfortable! I’ve walked into a place and my spine stiffens and I go into Caution Mode. I feel almost nauseated. That’s a no for me. If it feels like a prison – No. Do the kids seem happy or resigned? Kids shouting for joy and having a blast – Yes. Your kid is straining against your hand trying to get into the action? – Yes. Asking when they can go back? – Yes. Are the rooms colorful? Are there plenty of toys? Lots of variety? What is their curriculum? How long has the teacher been there? If there is high turnover, you have my permission to say, No!

I love our current daycare. The teachers are consistent, caring and the facility feels like a second home. They share my faith beliefs and teach my kids the same. BabyGirl loves the daycare and continues to have a great drop off and will sometimes finish her “castle” before running to me when I come to pick her up. That’s another one of those things that puts me at ease. She is content there and enjoys it, enough so that she doesn’t need to be “rescued.” It’s just a normal part of her day to play with her friends.

Drop off is hard and every kid is different. Drop off is usually easy for the first day or two and then for the next week or two is really rough. They cling and cry and say they don’t want to go. With a great fit at daycare, this will usually disappear when they realize that you do indeed return at the end of the day.

That being said, the daycare we went to last year was good for a few days and turned out awful for the next five months (violations in #1-3). I knew it wasn’t a good fit so she went on a waiting list for our current facility. I called every week asking if there were any openings. One day a couple of months later we received the good news. I turned in the two weeks’ notice to the daycare (don’t ever feel bad for doing this! Do what’s right for you and your kid!) and we haven’t looked back. Drop off at Daycare #2 was amazing from day one! No tears. Only excitement! We found the perfect fit for us and I wish you luck in finding the right daycare for you, too!

The Run Free Mama Dash

The Run Free Mama Dash

You’ve heard of the Warrior Dash, the Color Run, and even Glow Runs. Neat. We have, too. But when we tried to think of what makes a person a true athlete…a true warrior, if you will, there was nothing that more clearly identified the kind of champions we strive to be than this little adventure race called Motherhood.

When we saw the Run Free Mama Dash Adventure Race was going to be held on Mothers’ Day Weekend, we knew we owed it to ourselves and our precious children to see if we had what it takes to test our mental and physical mommy strength. So, we gathered the fiercest group of mothers around and signed up.

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We make mom jeans look GOOD. Team Mama Drama.

That was us before the race – do you see the war paint? Peanut Butter and Jelly. We refer to it as war paint. Because it was WAR.

Our adrenaline was really pumping as we geared up at the starting line. Our first challenge was to carry babies in the world’s heaviest mode of transportation known to man – infant car seats. They loaded our little darlings down with full diapers to really give the obstacle the extra 3.5 pounds of weight it needed. And let me tell you, carrying these while running the first 5K – not easy.

2014-05-07 19.03.45Starting line…I would also like to point out we all were instructed to carry a full grocery bag. Because why else would you go out of the house with a baby in a carrier but to try and buy sustenance for your family!?

2014-05-07 19.04.06Lovely friend Amy. Seriously. That is the face of a warrior.

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Still smiling because it was only the beginning. I was feeling pretty jazzed. My first race!

After a couple of minutes the arm holding the carrier started tiring and I had to switch a couple of times. I would end up switching again just in time for the feeling to come back in the opposite arm.

At this point we just kept telling ourselves to pretend it was a Sunday morning and we all remember those Sunday mornings of being 40 minutes late to church because of baby spit up, toddler tantrums, and poop…so much poop. But, by golly, you got everyone dressed and to church and you were not going to let a simple thing like “being on time” stop you. Once we channeled that, the 5K was a breeze!

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The next obstacle was The Diaper Crawl. This obstacle was built for us. Sure, as new mothers the smell of a baby’s poop was enough to send us gagging. But after changing somewhere in the range of 12,500 diapers, this obstacle was nothing we couldn’t handle. A little mommy competition may have even come out as we set out across the soiled battle field. The diaper powder was actually pretty helpful. All the sweat got absorbed and stayed out of my eyes pretty well.

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Brutal.

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After The Diaper Crawl, we ran another 3 miles to The Grocery Store Challenge. All mothers know that grocery shopping with children is its own special experience. Sometimes the children are wonderful and engaged in the shopping experience. Other times, you have to be ready to run through that grocery store like your life depended on it. Because YOU KNOW you have exactly as long as the free Target cookie lasts until one of your children has a complete meltdown.

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Amy and me. College roommates, friends since high school. It was natural for us to match our pace.

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Stephanie and Elizabeth. Caleb claimed Elizabeth’s son Cooper was his “cousin” because “we’re such good friends.” Little Mia was the sweetest little doe-eyed girly I’ve seen in a long time.

DSC_0042PUT YO’ GAME FACE ON!

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Public Service Announcement: If you own a pair of jeans that resemble these, THROW THEM AWAY!
Mothers of the world, give up the Mom Jeans. They are not flattering. At all.

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Why was this race so fun??? Because we had the loving support of our sweet husbands and children cheering us on the entire way! Just like any rough day, a simple sweet phrase and hug from your kiddo can make you feel like you can get back up and go an extra mile…or 20. The goldfish and juice boxes also provided just the sugar boost we needed.

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After making record breaking time at the Grocery Store Challenge, we sprinted to the next obstacle. While this one appears to be simple in nature, The Highchair Highway was trickier than we expected. We strapped our youngest ones in and ran 3.2 miles. We must admit, the Goldfish crackers being thrown from the trays became an obstacle in and of themselves. If you think Goldfish dust isn’t a real thing, then you’ve never strapped a one-year-old in a highchair and run 3.2 miles. It’s all kinds of real.

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But that Highchair challenge was only the beginning of the food throwing we were about to endure. As mothers, we’ve all been covered in peas, corn, and multiple other foods on more occasions than we can count. In fact, from the time our children were ages birth through 3, most of us didn’t purchase any new clothes because we just knew they’d end up covered in stains. So, this was a challenge we were fully prepared for. You aren’t a true mommy warrior unless you’ve been pelted with handfuls of corn and peas from multiple children all at one time!

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Caleb enjoyed it a little TOO much.

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The biggest challenge we had to face was the emotional endurance test – the Mile Long Nag. We ran as fast as we could through this obstacle, gathering our patience and endurance to help us push through. It was tough. It was draining. Even now, I can barely speak of the challenge without my head tilting slightly and forehead vein popping out.

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Once we made it through that obstacle, we were tired. We were worn. We were exhausted. This race of motherhood isn’t for the faint of heart. But we kept running because that’s what mothers do. One foot in front of the other. One step at a time. And then we looked up and remembered why we do it. Because the blessings for which we run are completely worth it. And as we crossed that finish line, we were met with their sweet little faces eager to say, “GOOD JOB, MOMMY!” There, waiting at the finish line were our adorable children with their homemade medals. They were so proud of us!

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They made them for us!

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Whew! Made it! Such a relief!

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You see, our children were waiting for us at a streamer that marked the end of this little adventure on pavement. But the true adventure of Motherhood never ends. From the day you find out you are expecting a bundle of joy, you are a mother. And you get the privilege of having that title for…forever. No matter the age of your baby or the stage of life they are in, you will always be “Mom.” What a blessing. What a privilege. What a journey. And so on this Mother’s Day Weekend, we are reminded that this job – MOTHERHOOD – it is work. It is hard. It is 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. And there is nothing better than getting to do it each and every day.

 

Disclaimer: No children were harmed during the course of the Run Free Mama Dash Adventure Race. Blog post was written in conjunction with 2 Kids Playing House and Pyles of Fun.

 

Eat fat, get skinny

Eat fat, get skinny

I’ve always been the skinny one. I was able to eat whatever I wanted. I ate Taco Mayo, candy, chips, soda, all the really goooood tasting stuff. And I never gained weight. Until I met my future husband. Then I gained 190 pounds! Haha, just kidding, I love you babe! We ate out, we were fat and happy and in wuuuuv.

On my eat-whatever-I-want diet I gained 5 pounds, then 10. Then when we got married and I had babies. My weight, naturally, yo-yoed a bit. Breastfeeding helped, but there was a little cushion left over. Last summer after a pretty stressful year (wah, cry me a river), I weighed myself for the first time in a looooong time. I weighed 155 lbs. Um, wow. That’s 30 pounds more than I weighed in high school. Twenty pounds more than college. I was in denial. I stepped off the scale and let it reset. Stepped back on. I did this three or four times. Then I stepped out of the bathroom. And then I went back in and weighed myself again. There it was, staring back at me. One hundred and fifty-five pounds. 

Now, I know there are women out there reading this that want to ring my neck. “I would kill to be 155!” But here’s the thing, 155 was OK. But it wasn’t great. And it wasn’t what I wanted. I had a sizable poochy tummy. Pint-size asked me several times if I was pregnant again. So, 155 was not for me.

I knew I could be a healthier weight. I do not want to be 125 again – that’s ridiculous for 5’9″. I think 135 is ambitious but I’m not going to let fear get in the way. I want to be 135 and I’m going to be 135.

So, I decided to do something about it. Hubs had a lot of success with a diet a year ago…maybe I could try it for a bit.

Since early January Hubs has lost 29 pounds and I’ve lost 15 pounds!!  

We changed our diet. We have ONLY changed our diet*. We still get to eat some of our very favorite foods: Buffalo Wings, bacon, sauteed fresh okra (OK, that’s one of my favorites), eggs, butter, bacon, steak, and bacon. Did I mention bacon?

The reason we can eat this stuff is because we’re on the Ketogenic diet. Your body needs fat (yes, saturated fat, too) to operate properly. Fat makes up the majority of our cells’ membranes! The brain and body actually prefer using ketones (natural and normal chemical reaction in the body for energy) and run 70% more efficiently than when using glucose (excessive amounts of carbohydrates are broken down into glucose in the body) for energy. Fat does not make you fat. I promise. Sugar and carbs make you fat, if you eat too much of them. The Western diet we’re accustomed to has way too many carbohydrates in it. The food pyramid the FDA (or is it USDA? YMCA? ABC?) has been pushing since I was kid has grains as the lowest and biggest chunk of the pyramid. Grains are not bad. Eating 300+ grams of grainy-sugary carbohydrates in a day is bad. Especially for our mostly sedentary lives. My goal is to eat around 15-20 net carbs a day. And I’ve lost 15 pounds since January 6. Do the math.

We eat high fat, moderate protein, low carb. This diet is not just for thinner women to lose a little weight, either. This diet has been transforming late-stage type 2 diabetics into healthier people who don’t need to medicate anymore. It helps obese individuals get to healthy weights! People are dropping HUNDREDS of pounds in a year, in a healthy way. Their blood pressure goes down, their HDL levels go a little higher, their LDL levels go much lower, their triglyceride levels go way down. (those are all good things)

I feel so much better. Eating fatty foods, protein, and veg all day keeps my energy level even. No more afternoon slump. No more hungry thirty minutes after I’ve eaten. I miss doughnuts, milk chocolate (I can eat really dark chocolate once in a while), cake, ice cream, candy… But I’ll shamefully quote Kate Moss here, “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.” I seriously feel better, my clothes fit better and I have more energy. I get up in the morning and I’m not stumbling around like a zombie. My acne is all but gone – seriously, this is amazing. I’ve struggled with it for years! I can tell if I have “treated” myself a little too much and let too many carbs slip in…I break out!! Then I look at the zits and say, “With God as my witness….I WILL NEVAH EAT CARBS AGAYUN!”

I will note that the couple of times when I couldn’t take it anymore, I would sneak a piece of candy or eat a small piece of bread -but the fleeting sweetness fell flat after I swallowed. Think about what that Little Debbie doughnut is doing for you. It’s not nutritious. The only pleasure is the taste in your mouth. It’s awesome, don’t get me wrong. But I pay for that doughnut twice. I pay the clerk at the store for it, then I pay for it in belly fat bucks. Belly fat bucks are a long-term investment. A bad one. I will say: I still enjoy a Little Debbie morsel every once and a while BUT – I don’t feel the need to eat a whole package anymore. I taste and savor things differently now.

Comment below if you have any questions. Chad and I belong to a forum on Reddit specifically for keto. You might check it out. They have an FAQ that might help if you’re interested in trying it.

And our journey isn’t finished. We’re still pushing each other to be healthier and make better choices. It’s so nice having a buddy!

*We are investigating how to add exercise to our lives. When you find that sweet spot of two full-time working parent, two kids under 8 and taking care of all the other “stuff” of life, let me know how that works. 😉

Mini-Minimalism

Mini-Minimalism

There are those who are destined for greatness and those who have greatness thrust upon them. Or some such nonsense.

We’ve had a rough year. Lots of ups and downs and curve balls. We keep rolling with the punches and keep getting up.

About 90% of our stuff is in storage. We’re surviving in a “transition” time in our lives with clothes, shoes, computer, toiletries, some toys, some yarn and needles, beds and our dressers. Nothing else. That being said, we of course have access to medicines, cookery, washing machine and dryer, fridge, range, etc.

It is amazing how freeing it is to be living with the bare minimum. I go shopping at Target and see all the lovelies and think, do I really want that? I don’t even ask myself if I need it. If I needed it, I wouldn’t be having an internal dialogue about it. 

I find myself waiting to have a need first. It’s amazing how freeing it is to not feel that need to strive and go go go go go. I live most of my days in the moment. I’m not constantly worrying about how my house looks, or reorganizing this junk or buying the latest tupper-store-it-all-with-ease contraption.

The question boils down to what can you take with you? What can you pack up and take to the nursing home? to the safety of your lawn if your house burns down? to Heaven? Think about the days after your death. Your children or grandchildren are sad, probably remembering all sorts of things about you. Conversations, the small moments that made up your day-to-day routine with them, how you treated them. Then they have the burden of deciding what to do with all your stuff. Do you have a closet full of junk and knick knacks that aren’t worth anything and that will cost more money to send to the dump than you even spent on them? I’m preaching to myself here, people. I shudder to think of all the things I would buy at the dollar spot only to have it fall apart and be thrown away. Sometimes, as I’m letting the kids plunder through the junky toys (I hardly ever let them buy anything like that now) I think through a process of “Do I want to become the middle man?” Essentially for a lot of the dollar store-type toys it’s just a matter of time before you toss them in a landfill. Do I want to be the person who puts it there? I don’t! Why waste the time and money on something I don’t need and just be a keeper of the thing for a couple of weeks?

I want to take more memories. I want to remember how we used to go to the museum with the kids, going on hikes, playing board games, flying kites. Memories don’t take up physical space and you can have as many as you want!

There are so many things worth my time and money. Junk to fill up space isn’t it! I would much rather give like there’s no tomorrow instead of hoarding like there’s no tomorrow. After all, you can’t take it with you.

“We Don’t Have TV”

“We Don’t Have TV”

You run into it all over the internet (or at church or at the market). A parent, a minimalist, a budgeter… “We don’t have TV.” It’s a great way to make someone feel a little worse about plunking their kids in front of Dora, Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, or Bubble Guppies. The conversation could go like this:

Person A: “Did you catch Downton Abbey/Walking Dead/Big Bang Theory?”

Person B: “No, we dont have TV.”

Person A: “Oh. Ok. Well…”I read a comment on Jon Acuff’s Blog where someone with a very superior air commented: “We don’t have TV.” He sounded so sure of his minimalist, moral status as an amazing human being who doesn’t sink to the level of a plebeian Boob Tuber only to say three comments later, “well, of course we watch SHOWS, but no cable TV at our house.”What!?!? Didn’t you JUST say that you didnt have TV!?

Here’s the thing. There must be a distinct difference between “We don’t have TV” and “We don’t have A TV.”

My high school physics teacher told us he was going to retire to his cabin where he did not have running water, electricity, nor a television. He relies solely on a ham radio or other such things, but no TV. Now THAT is someone I believe when he says he doesn’t have TV. Somehow the phrase “we don’t have TV” does not mean a television SET, rather it means you don’t have cable. So, take heart moms and dads who don’t pay extra for cable either, the high ground your compadres inhabit may be closer than you think.

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What Being “Saved” Feels Like

What Being “Saved” Feels Like

I have had experience on both sides of the road. I was “lost” longer than I have been saved. For the first 20 years of my life I didn’t realize I was lost. I didn’t know there was anyone looking for me. I was a nice person, I never murdered anyone, I didn’t lie hardly at all (and if you know me- you know I’m being very serious here). So, why wouldn’t Peter let me in the Pearly Gates?

I knew very little of the Bible. The first time I ever cracked open my dad’s King James was when I was 19. It was on the third bookshelf above the knick knacks to the right of the fireplace in our living room. The denim book cover had a monster zipper with huge teeth. The pull itself was almost two inches across. It seemed so heavy and important. Even though I didn’t fully grasp what it meant, I figured it was something to be read in hushed tones with reverent eyes and clasped hands. I unzipped the huge cover and tried to find Job. I had asked my dad earlier that day about my AP English homework, “How does the story compare with the story of Job? (I pronounced it like jahb) — Who the heck is that? What are they even talking about!?”

“It’s in the Bible.” I remembered being very surprised that my dad, of all people a vehement agnostic/atheist, would know anything about a person from the Bible. It turns out he studied the Bible a lot when he was attending church in his 20s. He ended up leaving the church and never looking back. His lack of continual faith, he said, was to be blamed on hypocrisy and divisiveness in his church.

So, there I was flipping through the tissue paper thin pages trying to find the story of Job. How do these numbers work? I was so confused. Number colon number. So many many books inside. Where do I start? There were two parts to the thing, right?I finally got around to reading the story of Job with my dad helping me navigate. I don’t remember my first impressions of my first foray into the Bible – other than it was long and was boring. I remember how I came to know Jesus, though.

I was 20 years old. It wasn’t a particular conversation. It wasn’t a gospel tract. I’m sure there were people who prayed for me, but honestly, very few people knew I was not a Christian until they asked me. I would say, “I’m agnostic.” “Oh, what does that mean?” “It means I believe it is impossible to determine whether there is an afterlife or a higher being.” They were all very impressed with my confidence, my quickly and verbosely defined status. In high school people assumed I was saved. Why? Because I was nice. I could not have been further from it. I have battled darker demons (I use the term lightly here, because I believe, theologically, there are such things as demons) than some. Insecurities, anger, depression, deception, defilement…the list goes on. But I don’t need to go on. I’ll tell you why.

Salvation is a head rush. There is an excitement that rushes up within your gut. It feels an awful lot like adrenaline but it’s not the same. (The actual physical feeling could me my personal experience, so take this with a grain of salt, please) Salvation is a one-time event. A moment of realization, a decision and that is when you begin. It is not the destination. Far from it! Sanctification is what happens after. The less glamorous harder working side of the life of a saved person. My salvation came when I was sitting in a church in Stillwater. I had been going to church for several months before all the pieces came together. Oh, OK. Jesus was God, came down to earth, lived a perfect life as a human, went through all the temptations we went through, died a sinner’s death on the cross in our place, paid the price for our sin, was buried and three days later rose from the dead, and now sits in Heaven waiting for us. Now you have the rest of your life to figure out what that means for you.

Being saved ruins your world view. It messes up your life completely. No longer can you sit idly by and let life happen to you. You can’t enjoy the same things you used to. Everything changes. A filter is put into place and everything is different. You’re more merciful to people. More forgiving. Because I know perfection in my God, I know that no one can be perfect. No one can save themselves because we’re all wicked. We’re all on a level playing field. I pray for people, I serve people, not for the transcript boosters, not for the volunteer hours, but because I love Jesus and Jesus loves me. No other reason.

I messed up badly after I was saved. BADLY. I still do. I make a lot of mistakes. I do a lot of unholy things. But you know what is awesome? I go back to the cross, I lay it down and I ask for forgiveness. If I repent…change my mind…then I am forgiven and I start over fresh. That’s amazing. There is something miraculous about being right with God. It’s scary. It’s awesome. It comes with a crap-ton of responsibility. You can’t live like you used to. You can’t scream obscenities at the driver who cut you off in traffic. You can’t cheat and steal your way to the top. You can’t be unforgiving to your spouse. You have to be like Jesus. And trust me, those are some tough shoes to fill. But, hear me – it’s not about what I do!! Jesus has done all the work. I just show up. I just believe in him. I believe in his atoning sacrifice. I believe that he is enough to pay for my sins and everyone’s sins…ever.

If you have any questions, please feel free to hit me up in the comments. I’m not perfect. I point to a Savior who is. He is the Lord of my life. He is in control of who I am now and I love it. I am different. I am changing and will continue to change. I eagerly await his return, or my death, whichever comes first. I get it wrong a lot, but I have his Word (which I can read very easily now, thankyouverymuch!) and his promise that he will love me forever. I am a wicked person, who relies on a God who reached down and said, “Come with me if you want to live.”